Empaths and Narcissistic Relationships

The term narcissism has been highlighted in articles and social media in recent years to the point that it has become a part of the norm.  Interwoven into our everyday discourse.  To the extent that it has become vilified.  Narcissistic traits in our bosses at work or a co-worker for example.  But what if those narcissistic traits exist in the family unit?  Narcissism is less likely to be addressed within the family unit because the dynamic functions could be seen as a closed ecosystem compounded by consistent masking in public, narcissistic traits are cleverly disguised as charismatic and friendly characters.  The old adage “street angle, house devil” springs to mind.

Some families are complicit in keeping the status quo due to many factors.  Such as image protection (of the family) and fear of retaliation by the narcissist.  Trauma bonding is another factor in keeping the recipient from making the break away that is so sorely needed. When my clients come to see me with outside presenting issues, who are clearly being emotionally and psychologically abused, it becomes apparent that they have been the recipients of narcissistic gaslighting, scapegoating and blames-shifting to name but a few of the tactics that keep people stuck.  Eroded of self-confidence and feeling trapped. 

From the outset, it is easy to ask the question: “why do they remain in an abusive relationship?” This is a fundamental question that has been asked since the dawn of existence.  My counselling near me helps to unravel the family ecosystem and my client’s individual childhood dynamics and repressed distorted core beliefs that enables some fundamental understanding as to why they were (are) still vulnerable to such abuse.  Another reason why some people are more vulnerable to emotional and psychological abuse is that they are Empaths.

Empaths are very sensitive beings and tend to be “enablers” in order to sustain the family unit as they need to see it and are prone to keep the peace.  Especially when their children are young and/or at school age.  What isn’t commonly known is that children can internalise parental narcissistic traits and project them outwardly in their own adulthoods.  Narcissism is learned. It is not born.  Although I can confidently say that over my 24 years clinical practice, it is inherited trans generationally.  This transgenerational pattern can be eradicated by making it conscious and taking steps to walk away from it permanently by enabling my clients to step away from entrenched family roles. Counselling in St Albans can help you uncover behavioural patterns that have become normalised or minimised in order to survive another day.

Another common problem I have experienced in my practice is that older children have inherited narcissistic traits that have become part of their own personalities because they were not challenged at an early age.  This pattern continues throughout their own interpersonal relationships, including platonic friendships, that are very difficult to sustain.  The heartache continues to plague the generations to come that may include addictions such as drugs and alcohol as a form of self-medication for those that are suffering from this type of abuse.

I can help you to set healthy boundaries whilst discovering the buried parts of you that went into hiding because of constant everyday firefighting that can blind the person to the fact that their basic and essential needs are not being met.  Recovering from narcissistic abuse is a process of self-discovery and grieving for the life that you deserved but didn’t get.  Up until now.

If you feel that you are trapped in a narcissistic relationship(s) please contact me today at Penny Glazebrook Counselling and Psychotherapy.  I will help facilitate your journey of recovery so that you can look forward to a renewed life of freedom and liberty.